I'm not quite sure what came over me.
I just wanted to leave. To just get on a plane and be somewhere-not-here for a day. My friend from work and I have joked about it for so long, that it just became a thing we said whenever we had this sudden urge to escape.
A few weeks ago, my friend and I had this conversation. We laughed because we knew we didn't mean it. In the end, we knew would never leave. As usual, our logical minds took over. Leaving was never the answer. If we went, it would be the stupidest thing we could ever do--financially and otherwise. We had other obligations that we were loyal to. And so, we recited our lines and arrived at the same conclusion that we always come to: we can't leave.
I'm not sure who said it first, but the subject of Disneyland came up. We justified that we could visit for the day and be back for work the next day. It would be cheaper than escaping to London or Hawaii (my standby choices) and it was actually feasible.
I'm not quite sure what came over me.
If our conversation was a Pinter play, this is where the twist would happen. One of the characters would change the dialogue and suddenly what the two characters had been talking about for two scenes suddenly wasn't what audience originally had thought the play was about.
After the seventh or seventeenth excuse of how actually escaping to Disneyland for a single day was not a good idea, I was convinced that we really needed to go. I told my friend that I was serious about going and that we should go. I offered to go the next day and we recited the usual barrage of excuses.
Suddenly, hopping on a plane for a single day trip to Disneyland wasn't something I just said. It was something I had to do. I didn't care how careless and lame it sounded; Disneyland for a day? Why would anyone in her right mind go for a day?
I couldn't provide a reason to justify going. I just wanted to go.
I couldn't explain why escaping was a good idea. I just wanted to go.
I couldn't hide behind my obligations to people and activities that would certainly go one without me. I just wanted to go.
And I wanted to go now.
Granted, in the grand scheme of things, going on a day trip to Disneyland isn't high on the risk taking scale. But it wasn't just about going to Disneyland. It was about just going somewhere with the sole purpose of having fun. It was about doing something more than just talking about what I wanted to do instead of just doing it. It was about doing something unexpected. Illogical. Out of the ordinary.
Un-Abby.
And I don’t regret it for a second. I don’t think I ever will. And I hope this is a beginning of many new adventures to come.
