Release

The struggle is finally over...ish. (I'm sure another one is in the horizon).

I am always sad when things end. I hate when things end and when I have to walk away. But I came to this realization that the decision wasn't mine. God made my decision and asked me to obey. My decision was to obey.

As with most things, it was easier than I had thought. It was still hard to put my foot down, turn on my heel and walk away, but it wasn't the soul-breaking thing I had feared.

I hate hurting people's feelings. I hate breaking people's hearts. But its not my decision. I don't see the bigger picture that God does. All he wants me to do is obey.

Funny thing is, once I followed up my words with action, the release that I had been seeking for so long finally came upon me. I could no longer remember why I was fighting.

I just hope I remember this when the inevitable storm on the horizon appears and I end up with the same kind of struggles. And maybe this time, I'll be quick to obey instead of wondering how I can hold my breath and survive on my own.

I wish for many things. But this isn't about wishes. This is about choices. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong? --Buffy